No Thank You, I Am Married

Ever since Napa County, California, wrongfully convicted me as a sex offender, I have to duck at 3:00 pm because couples suggest with subtle hints that they want me to engage in a threesome. Today, at 3 pm I was ready. I have a big yellow palomino horse that I can get to hang out his big horsey penis on cue. So, when my annoying neighbors (who f - - - all day long) came out at 3 pm, there he was, the third one in line for the roll in the hay!

Isn't That Funny?

What's a studio?

It's one step away from being homeless.

Ssshhhhh! My son is sleeping. Don't make any noise until after 10:30 am. He only wakes up early to do work on Saturdays.

"Give me liberty or give me death". Or, just vindicate me with a war-time criminal President.

Yad Vashem, together with its partners, has collected and recorded here the names and biographical details of half of the six million Jews murdered by the Nazis and their accomplices. Millions more still remain unidentified: It is our collective duty to persist until all their names are recovered.

Do you know of a Holocaust Victim? Submit Pages of Testimony and send photographs of the victims so they will always be remembered.

You Win! It's My Fault!

Reminds me of the time I waited for a year and half to save and pay for my transmission kit for one of my automotive classes. I replaced my friends manuel clutch in his transmission and now it was my turn. Except, when two guys were stationed on each transmission project, I just happened to have about eight guys stationed and blocking my project. My teacher got mad at me in front of everyone because I didn't think it was fair so he ran me out of class for a couple weeks. Blamed it on me. Said I was crazy. Isn't that funny?

I had this friend who wrote out and gave tickets for vehicular infractions. She use to stand out on the drivers side a little out in the lane. I was frightened for her safety. Today, the best joke is riding a bicycle around. I ride on the opposite side of the road so I can see if someone is driving eratically while heading my direction. When punks see me they like to swerve over in the opposite lane and yell out hoodlum stuff. Isn't that funny?

One day I was standing in the checkout lane at the Albertson's Supermarket and noticed a partial piece of fruit that was eaten and tossed on the floor. After thinking about it for a while, I picked it up and gave it to the checkout attendant so no one would slip on it. He said, "Did you do that? Just kidding." Isn't that funny?

The other day, I was riding my horse. An old man said my horse was nice. He wanted to know how much I wanted for her. I asked him if he saw a for sale sign on her. Isn't that funny?

Whispers, Murmurs, and Hissing At The Front Of Her Cell

You watched our fireworks last night. NOW YOU WILL PAY!

We are in control because cops are scare of us. You will babysit our Gentile children (free) Or, else we will say you are stalking my wife. No one will believe you because you are a human toilet! Now that's something to heckle about!

Kiss my feet

How about a knuckle sandwich?

Noooooo. You freak'n complain too much. If you want to know what pain is, go get some of these!

Are you okay? You feel sick? Let me take care of you.

You gotta admit, we're much more prettier than those women in prison who have syringe scars all over their legs.

After this pregnacy we can adopt. You can't because you are a pervert.

You said you like fat women. I even smoke. I hear you like the smell and taste of tobacco stench. I don't chew tobacco so I can't spit tobacco in your mouth. But, I sure can spit a tobacco luggie on you if that turns you on.

Don't mind Kini. She is just jealous because we have cars and children and she has nothing or no one. She can work all day and no one will vouch that she did all that heavy labor because the Napa Police Department in California made sure she has no friends or family to be a witness. We can take the credit for all the hard work she does! Hey! Those are MY tools. What does a woman need tools for? Their place is at a job bringing home the money for us! By the way, isn't today payday?

I don't know what to say. Every time I see Kini, I feel like telling her what a bad and horrible person she is. There is nothing good that comes out of my mouth because I have too much pride. If I belittle and call her a bunch of terrible names, she will be under my control. That's the only way to deal with her. Most of the time, I can't look her in the eye. But, every time I have to confront her, I like to stare her down and give her dirty looks and stares of hatred! That's the kind of stuff that turns me on. Being mean! Just being plain mean because I don't know how to be nice! Don't you just love those love hate relationships? Since I don't have a mind of my own, I'll just ask the guys.

She was stalking me! Who else could it be?

Check out the evidence, if you don't believe me.

And me. She was stalking me. Check out the evidence if you don't believe me.

Young is the way to go! She likes them young. Every pervert like them young! She better not look over here. I'll start a bitch fight.